It still hurts.
Even after all this time of not being in baby-making mode, it still hurts on occasion.
I'm going to a baby shower this weekend. For all of you reading who might say "why put yourself through that?", a) she's a very dear friend, and b) she went through infertility (without treatment for reasons I won't go into here) for six years before finally getting pregnant. She's been pretty understanding of all I've been going through and I feel like I can handle it.
At least I think so.
I just logged onto her baby registry to see what I might be able to get her.
She's got fish things on her registry.
There's an ocean creatures crib set and bouncy seat sitting in my closet at home that I bought because they were on sale and I couldn't resist them since I'm such an ocean lover.
I'm sure it's what I'll buy; after all, it's what I would have bought for someone if none of the past two years and all the heartache had ever happened.
I just wish it wasn't going to be so hard to watch her open it.
I'm going to a baby shower this weekend. For all of you reading who might say "why put yourself through that?", a) she's a very dear friend, and b) she went through infertility (without treatment for reasons I won't go into here) for six years before finally getting pregnant. She's been pretty understanding of all I've been going through and I feel like I can handle it.
At least I think so.
I just logged onto her baby registry to see what I might be able to get her.
She's got fish things on her registry.
There's an ocean creatures crib set and bouncy seat sitting in my closet at home that I bought because they were on sale and I couldn't resist them since I'm such an ocean lover.
I'm sure it's what I'll buy; after all, it's what I would have bought for someone if none of the past two years and all the heartache had ever happened.
I just wish it wasn't going to be so hard to watch her open it.
posted by Lisa P. at 12:31 PM
5 Comments:
Here's my two cents worth...
It will hurt...but it will be a little bit healing too. I can't explain it really except to say that I'm sure you won't be sorry you chose to attend (with whatever gift you give).
That's the problem ... the rest of the world just keeps on reproducing.
All we can do is TRY (hah!) to stay positive and support those we love when they get what we would soooooo love to have.
I understand. We're split. We think, "I'm so happy for you! So very happy." And "Why can't it be me?" It's really hard. I hope that your friend has the presence of mind to make a little gesture or just say a kind word to you. Any chance you could bring someone? I've only gone to co-ed showers where I can bring my husband. It helps.
Ugh, that's one hurdle I have yet to jump. I hope it went okay and I hope, as Catherine said, it was a little healing.
Let me know. I'll have one coming up for a former fellow infertile friend in a few months...
(((((((HUGS))))))
Hope it went better than expected.
I wouldn't do it, though. I am sooo about avoidance.
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