Sidetracked

This past Wednesday and Thursday, I worked half-days for the temp agency, doing training (Wednesday) and registration (Thursday) for a large convention at the downtown convention center. The convention was a large women's conference sponsored by our state's governor, and featured several well-known speakers, breakout sessions on things such as "bridging the gender gap," "women creating change," and "what makes a leader." All geared towards women in business, or nonprofits, or whatever field most of the attendees happened to be part of.

This was the type of event that five yers ago, I'd probably have been interested in attending. Ironically, I saw the name of one of my former bosses on the attendee list, the one that I was working for when I had my first panic attacks. It's truly a small world in nonprofit management, and had I stayed in that field, I'd be running into the same people, including said former boss, again and again. (I managed to avoid coming into contact with her the actual day of the conference, but just barely -- out of a conference of 5000+ women, who'd have thought I'd run into the one person I didn't want to see -- luckily she didn't see me, though.)

But I'm not in that world anymore; I jumped off that career track. To be frank, I don't know that I was ever really on it, as my job history back then was rather "jumpy" (it seems like I was starting a new position every July, according to my resume); but part of that I think stems from my inability to find a position I liked in the part of nonprofit management I really enjoyed, which was grant writing. Who knows where I'd be now if that had worked differently.

In thinking about career tracks, though, I realized that I'm *also* not really on the "mommy track" that a lot of women seem to find themselves on after having a baby. I've never had a problem with the idea of staying at home to raise a family, and while I know it's not the right choice for some women, I believe that either choice is right as long as you're on the track that makes you the most comfortable. (Catherine had a good post about this a few months back, actually.) And I want to be on the "mommy" track, certainly, but right now it's as though I'm in limbo, waiting at a junction to see whether or not the right switch will be thrown.

The people who hired me for my most recent temp assignment seem rather amazed that I'm doing temp work; someone with my education and skill set could be off "creating change" or being a leader; instead I'm covering phones on lunch break and doing clerical stuff. And overall I'm happy. It's just odd to see those two tracks cross one another, since they don't normally intersect.