The man who knew too much...
Ok, I've read lots of other bloggers post about Dr. Google and trying to make sure we know more than the doctors (which we DO! right??), etc., but I think I read the funniest description of the evil doctor who lives inside our own brains on this blog, where the author describes her own experiences with "the Infoholic Witch." Read it and weep, either hysterically or because you relate a little too closely, like I did...
G told me tonight that I probably "have too much information" at this point to do anything but cause me more worry. He's right; I know he is. One thing I didn't mention about the HSG is that the doctor said he thought he saw "an adhesion" (I think that's what he said anyway) and so I have spent the entire day educating myself on all possible variants of said diagnosis. That, along with the surgical procedures used to remove a septum, and I've managed to SCARE THE PANTS off myself. So why do I keep doing it?? I don't know. Human nature I guess. (Please tell me I'm not alone!)
So for now, the plan is to try to stay calm, wait for the report, and not get ahead of myself. Oh, and to disable my Google bookmarks, at least for a few days. I'll let you know if it works. Ha, ha.
G told me tonight that I probably "have too much information" at this point to do anything but cause me more worry. He's right; I know he is. One thing I didn't mention about the HSG is that the doctor said he thought he saw "an adhesion" (I think that's what he said anyway) and so I have spent the entire day educating myself on all possible variants of said diagnosis. That, along with the surgical procedures used to remove a septum, and I've managed to SCARE THE PANTS off myself. So why do I keep doing it?? I don't know. Human nature I guess. (Please tell me I'm not alone!)
So for now, the plan is to try to stay calm, wait for the report, and not get ahead of myself. Oh, and to disable my Google bookmarks, at least for a few days. I'll let you know if it works. Ha, ha.
posted by Lisa P. at 8:02 PM
3 Comments:
Information is power. Power is scary. You either embrace it and become your own best advocate, or you hide from it and hope for the best. Personally, I prefer the former...even if it scares your pants off.
What is the alternative though?? KNowing nothing = blissful ignorance.
Personally I think the shock factor was what made Feb's m/c so devestating. This last one was still very upsetting but the lack of shock/preparedness has made it infinitely easier to deal with.
You go girl! You are going to worry anyway and I would think stumbling around in the dark is way scarier than getting through an obstacle course with your eyes wide open:)
You're probably too adept at Google searches to have the absent bookmarks slow you down. I know I am.
Both my mother and my husband (Mom reads magazines, John reads comic books) both think I read too much and thus GET NERVOUS. I'm with Catherine. Knowledge is empowering and prepares us for intelligent conversations with our doctors and others who are going through the same thing we are. Besides, even though we'd never thought we'd have to know this six months ago, we can spell 'reproductive endocrinologist' and 'antiphospholipid' and impress our friends and family.
By the way, I have three books coming today from Amazon - 'Motherhood Lost,' 'Miscarriage After Infertility' (recommended by and coauthored by my RE's nurse practitioner) and 'When Bad Things Happen to Good People.' I would not have ordered them had I thought they would be bad for me. We NEED to know. And, along with that, we're bound to get negative comments from otherwise caring people who can easily put our pain out of their minds, not realizing that we NEVER stop thinking.
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